While I did do a Tarot reading for what work I am to be doing with Cerridwen I really didn’t interpret it fully because I got distracted. I asked for confirmations though to make sure things were happening or whatever. I have a tendency to compound multiple signs on beings I work with to confirm that they are there and everything else. This time I chose three separate symbols.
First sign I asked for was pigs. Another was bears. And the third was charity. I don’t often see pigs where I live, or on my dash for that matter. However, I got quite a few after I started complaining that Cerridwen wasn’t very good at sending signs. But it was still just pigs so I insisted that I needed to see bears and charity as well. I did get quite a few bears show up then too.
Charity was a little harder, but it came in time and while I didn’t think of it at first, my roommate had invited me to do the Race for the Cure this weekend with her, which is obviously charity.
Anyway, the confirmations are not the point of this post. I just felt it was necessary to mention that I did some confirmation work with Cerridwen. What I really want to talk about is the actual work Cerridwen is having me do with her.
Our work was broken up into three evenings. Each evening was set up as different stage to the process. While I don’t usually work within the confines of specific myths nor do I work through any being’s mythos as a journey, this work with Cerridwen has been set up that way.
Each was set up like a journey meditation. Granted, some nights I fell asleep in the process, I am aware of the work we did in the astral for this, initiation as it were. These past three evenings have been a necessary part of the task as they occurred at the new moon, a time of new beginnings. Hence why the Morrigan was insistent I work with Cerridwen this week so I could get this, whatever it is, done on time.
The First Evening: Stage One
She has already told me that she always has this potion on hand, or at least a version of it. People need it at various times. Whether it is just a sip or whatever, she always has it ready.
She would just give it to me, but our work is somethings a little different from just giving me a sip. She tells me that the journey work of sitting and brewing the potion is what needs to occur. The journey through the story of Gwion Bach who became Taliesin.
I am at Cerridwen’s Cauldron outside a small hut. She has started the brew, but hands me the long handled wooden spoon to continue stirring the potion. I am to add nine herbs through the course of the sped up year-and-a-day all at precise times. Though, in the story this is her job, I am supposed to do it while attending the fire and continuing to stir the simmering concoction.
Each herb means something. She selected them to match the list I gave her of the things I wished to improve upon the first time we met. Each one she selected to bring me a gift in this life: to either increase what I already have or to bless me with a new one. I don’t know the herbs. Some hold multiple meanings. I could ask her what they are, but I won’t. Not right now.
The light shifts quickly here, in this place outside of time and space. The sunlight rises and falls and the moon gleams down and falls as the sun returns over and over again. The days pass as I continue to add the herbs at various points. As I continue to stir the concoction each day passes. She comes to check but we don’t talk during this time. She just checks in.
Then it is the end. The last of the herbs have finally been added at all the proper times. The potion simmering as I stir it together. The last day has arrived. I have been vigilant in maintaining the brew and the fire.
She returns again. We both know the story of how Gwion accidentally drips three drops of the hot potion on his thumb that he sucks to sooth. But rather than enact that moment, she just tells me to take three drops of the potion to drink myself. I comply, tasting the odd brew. As I swallow the last of the three drops, the fire goes out and the liquid turns black and dull.
There is a something I feel now, throughout my body. I don’t entirely know what the gifts are that she has bestowed upon with this potion, but I know they will come to me in time over these next few days.
She smiles and directs me back to my body to sleep. The next night is the next stage of the journey.
The Second Evening: Stage Two
I am back at the cauldron again. Cerridwen is there ready and waiting. While in the tale she is mad at Gwion for ruining the potion that is for her son. But she isn’t angry with me. She wanted me to brew the potion and drink from it and obtain its gifts. She does state we have to continue the journey through the story.
This evening, she tells me to run. I do and, as the story goes, I shapeshift into a hare fleeing quickly. I feel her pursuing me as a greyhound. The hot breath at my back. I come to a river and as I jump it I shift into a salmon and begin swimming quickly away through the water. It glides around me as I cut through it, but she is there behind me as an otter, maneuvering just as gracefully through the river.
I leap from the water and shift into a bird, flying away. Higher and higher and further away, but she is there as a hawk swooping down at me. I dodge and avoid her flying faster. I dive downwards to the ground. There is a pile of grain and I shift again as I hit it into a speck of grain. A needle in a haystack as it were. She won’t find me here. But she does, as a black hen eating up all the grain, including me and all goes dark.
The Third Evening: Stage Three
It’s dark where I am, but I feel different. New. Alive. I feel cramped as well, the dark space closing around me. But maybe it is more like I am growing larger in the small space. It is warm here, and comforting.
I feel my arms and legs growing as I squeeze tighter into a ball where I am. Again, I know the story, I know where I am. And when it feels like I can grow no further, when it feels I cannot sit stuck in this position any longer, everything changes.
It is light again. Too bright and cold compared to the warmth in the darkness. I am new and alive. I can stretch out and I no longer feel cramped in the tight space. But I’m chilled and it takes a while to see in the too bright light.
I feel her wrap me in something warm. At first I think it’s a blanket, but instead it is clothing. A robe or dress. It is long and warm and covers me almost completely. She’s humming gently a tune I don’t know.
My eyes begin to adjust and I see her. She is amused, it seems. I frown and glare at her as I continue to adjust to the light again. She laughs, her humming ceased, and directs me to sit by the fire with her.
The cauldron is there, smaller than before, but there with something simmering inside. It smells good, like a nice soup. The fire is warm and bright, but it isn’t as bright as it was at first. She ladles a couple scoops into a bowl and hands it to me, telling me to eat.
There is humming again, but not from her. Music playing in the background. I eat and listen to it as she sits and explains that these few nights are marking a transition. Into what, she is vague in explaining. She says the Morrigan will be better in answering where the path will lead next. She was here to initiate that change and transition. To bestow some gifts that would be needed.
Each gift, she says, will reveal itself in time. Some we had selected together while others were some the Morrigan had selected for me. These three nights were just the beginning stages of brining the gifts into my life to use for this next stage in my journey.
I have finished eating the soup and she takes the bowl from me and sets it aside before offering me her hand. I take it and she helps me up. She leads me out of the hut and we gaze up through the trees to the sky. The moon is dark, but instead all the stars shine brightly, more brightly than I have ever seen.
She takes me back to my body now. She tells me that while this was mostly meant to just be an initiation into these gifts, a journey to claim them, I am more than welcome to call upon her again if I need her for anything. She also suggests sitting with the Morrigan again very soon.
It was all fairly different than what I normally do, but it was also very interesting. I don’t know yet what all of the gifts are, but I think I will figure them out when I need to. It seems, for now, my work with Cerridwen is over, unless I need her for anything. I haven’t yet taken a chance to sit down with the Morrigan to see what is next for me, but that will hopefully happen sooner than later. *cough cough* Maybe then she won’t be so cranky.
I don’t really know what else to say at the moment really. Just needed to write this up while it was still fresh and all. Maybe I will follow up later, but for now, here is this little bit of my journey on this path.