The last year or so I have been really inconsistent with blogging here and on my other blogs. When I started hard core working on my shadow work and also made changes with my Tumblr blogs, things over here started to fall by the wayside a bit. I really do enjoy writing over here about some of the things that happen on my path. Shadow work was just busting my ass in a way I should have better anticipated, but it was well worth it.
There is something churning and moving inside me and on this path of mine. Taking this moment to sit and write is causing me to actually reflect on that. The Storm is coming on. The metallic taste in the air around me as the ions of this Storm moves closer. The clouds are rolling in with heavy rain and lightning ready to strike.
I think I have been avoiding noticing this for a while, but I feel it building around me now. I have a deep affinity for storms and lightning, so that doesn’t scare me. As the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end, the excitement actually begins to rise within me. But still, I have been avoiding this deluge for some reason.
I feel the changes in my mundane life in a strange way. I love teaching, but lately it has become tedious, and I think that is because I try to keep it so separate from my magical and spiritual life. My mundane life almost bores me so much that it becomes a chore to really do anything. I need more of a challenge in my life and teaching is no longer a challenge. The dissatisfaction is growing and feeding into this Storm.
I had pulled a card a couple weeks ago about what the Morrighan was wanting me to do next. While I actually forgot to write it down, I remember it was Temperance and it made me think about that balancing both sides of my life. I used to believe it meant just being able to spend time on both. But now, I see it more related to bringing more of my spiritual/metaphysical life into my mundane. Part of that currently involves applying to a local New Age shop that I hope to be able to work at soon. There is more to it than just that though and it makes me realize what my new goal needs to be.
When I first started writing this post yesterday, I had kept thinking about this building Storm and my affinity with them. I kept thinking about the Tarot too and significator cards for some reason. I immediately started thinking about how The Tower is one of the most appropriate cards for this feeling I have and who I am. What made this more interesting is that when I took my break from writing I was hanging out with my roommates and another friend discussing things. We started talking about creating tarot decks and one that would represent us and our journey and it was asked by each of us what our Major Arcana card was. I immediately said The Tower. I had already been thinking about it the same day. It made sense to me and my roommates seemed to think so too.
I don’t fully know where to go with that knowledge, how it relates at this point to the Storm I am feeling right now for myself. Though, honestly, there are multiple Storms right now, not just my own personal Storm. They will all collide and coalesce and combine into something more. But Storms always bring change. They can be scary, dark and terrifying. They are rarely quiet. Little is left the same after it passes. But there is such beauty in it. The Storm is so much like The Tower card, which is why that card always depicts lightning and a storm, which is why it is very much is me.
There are storms in my heart and lightning in my veins…
P.S. I am making plans to write more again on all of my blogs. I need to refocus myself again and writing helps me on my path. With this Storm coming I will need to write more to keep sanity as I weather through it all.